So, this is what it feels like?

This is what it feels like, huh? Falling in love and everything. I’ve always wondered and think to myself  “am i really in love with this guy?“— from my past relationships. I thought falling in love was being happy, getting the kilig feeling, can’t seem to go on a day without talking to that person and everything. But I guess, I was wrong. Love is something you can’t really explain. It’s a feeling that you feel, and cannot explain the feeling that you’re feeling. Some may say they feel happy, overjoyed, in love, and more. Yes of course you feel these but truth is, you can’t really explain the feeling of being in love. It drives you crazy, trying to figure out how you feel.   I have been with Cj for the past two months now. But I can tell, that I really am crazy about him. I really am in love with him. How’d I know? I think I loved him since that day. Well, there’s a lot of reasons why I love this guy, I can’t really tell the main reason why I’m in love with him. But here are the things I love about him…

  1. He makes me mad.
  2. He gives me the kilig feeling, every single day.
  3. Every time his name appears on my phone I always whisper “Ah! My baby! Yay!”
  4. He makes me cry.
  5. He makes me so elated.
  6. I get lost in his eyes.
  7. I want him only to myself.
  8. I can’t imagine myself without him, i’ll lose myself if i lose him.
  9. When we fight, I can’t fucking resist him so I end up forgiving him so easily.
  10. I always swallow my pride for him.
  11. I get to face my fears with him, especially when I know he’s there.
  12. Silence is comfortable.
  13. I can be weird around him.
  14. The most comfortable guy i can be with.
  15. He spits on me…
  16. He hits me with a pillow, but I love him.
  17. He’s weird.
  18. He gets jealous, i find that cute.
  19. He’s so cute when he’s mad.
  20. He gives me butterflies every time…weird but yeah.
  21. His smile lights up my world.
  22. Staring at him and, always, thinking “God, he’s perfect”
  23. He’s really attractive.
  24. Staring at him and i always catch myself smiling.
  25. He’s perfect.
  26. He holds my hand in public, well great job.
  27. He hugs me in public.
  29. A good kisser, cause damn his lips are perfect.
  30. He drives, and that turns me on.
  32. He’s gay…
  33. He’s annoying, but dammit still irresistible.
  34. He’s cute.
  35. I love his eyes.
  36. I love his smile.
  37. I fucking love his hugs from behind.
  38. I feel very secured when I’m with him.
  39. He brought back the old me, which I really am thankful for.
  40. I still fall for him, every day.
  41. He scares me, scared that he might find someone better.
  42. I’m afraid of losing him.
  43. I want him to be mine, forever. Sounds possessive, but yeah.
  44. I love all his corny jokes.
  45. Sabihin na nating, ma effort.
  46. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet, nakakamatay sa kilig.
  47. He believes in God, and I love that about him.
  48. Family-oriented.
  49. Has a weird laugh.
  50. Everything is seriously better with him.
  51. Never fails to make me smile.
  52. Makes me smile all the time, even when I’m not in the mood to smile.
  53. Understands my mood swings….
  54. It takes him 90000 hours to reply, and that makes me crazy!
  55. He sleeps on me.
  56. He is a gentleman.
  57. He takes care of me.
  58. He makes sure I’m fine.
  59. He asks me “How’s your day?
  60. He calls me a billion times when I don’t get to answer his first call.
  61. He calls me when I hung up on him.
  62. Sweet gestures, I’m a sucker for that.
  63. He’s mine, so everybody!!!!!!!!!! BACK THE FUCK OFF.
  64. I love him.
  65. I need him.
  66. I want him.
  67. I want to be with him, for the rest of my life.
  68. He’s everything to me.
  69. He’s my everything.
  70. He completes my day.
  71. He ruins it.
  72. He fixes it.
  73. He fixed me.
  74. I love him so fucking much.
  75. I am in love with him.
  76. I’m truly, madly, deeply inlove with him.
  77. Well, he’s a crazy dude but he doesn’t smoke. Hihihi
  78. I dont know if he’s a good or a bad influence to me…. HAHAHAHA
  79. Fuck this guy.
  80. He listens to me, all my nonsense dramas and stories.
  81. I’m in love with him.
  82. He makes me want stop and slow down the time.
  83. I can vent on him.
  84. He doesn’t judge my crazy trips.
  85. He ran and walked with me whilst it was raining.
  86. I rode a freaking ferris wheel, thanks to Cj.
  87. Very supportive.
  88. Very straight forward.
  89. Clingy.
  90. He likes yogurt.
  91. He loves bullying me.
  92. He bites me.
  93. I can rant to him.
  94. He bites his lip, I die.
  95. Every time I stare into his eyes, I feel something unexplainable happening inside of me….
  96. I love it when he tuck me in.
  97. I love his warm hugs and kisses.
  98. He’s very awkward, but very nice person.
  99. He has a kind heart, makes me more in love.
  100. I love to sleep with him, cuddle and I’m in love with him.

So there, the few reasons why he’s the best. He may not be perfect, but to me he is. We may fight and argue about stuff, but that keeps me going. Every time he gets jealous, I find it cute. And every time he gets jealous, mad, sad, pissed, it secures me. Because i know he cares. I know he loves me by showing those kind of emotions. I know my reasons are cliché but it’s the truth. He makes me overjoyed, sad, and everything. He makes me very bipolar. But i swear, i can’t freaking go on a day without talking to him.

May 2, 2014